The Gallery – Motherhood

This piece is written for The Gallery, hosted by Tara at Sticky Fingers.

*

The last three years have been a roller-coaster and have catapulted me, almost on a daily basis, between some of the highest highs and lowest lows of my life. I know that I never before experienced quite such an intensity of ‘being’ that I have felt since giving birth to my son and I know that this is down to him. Or maybe to ‘us’.

I represent to him all that is good and all that is bad combined … and, in phases, exclusively all that is bad. But on each occasion, when he surprises me with a fleeting gesture of love or appreciation, or learns something new, or expresses just that simple but immense enthusiasm for everything around him, something bursts into life inside of me and, yet again, I could explode with a euphoria impossible to put down in words.

I love my son, inexplicably and to the end of …. of all I have and all that I am capable of being.

Being here, with him, his mother, is so much where I want to be, but will I ever be at peace with motherhood? …. I don’t think so;

I’m not good enough at it for that.


Sometimes I can’t say goodbye

Sometimes he won’t say hello

But when he won’t say goodbye

How can I go?

.

Sometimes I need some time

Sometimes he runs away

But when he doesn’t want me there

How can I stay?

.

Often it’s me that’s wrong

Often he doesn’t care

But when we catch each other’s breath

I know he knows, I’m there …

for the duration.

.

*

MJM

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This entry was posted in Parenting, Photography, The Gallery and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

19 Responses to The Gallery – Motherhood

  1. fleetwoodboy says:

    You really are good with your writing. Great feeling comes out xx

  2. Gorgeous. Lucky boy. I am all weepy now!

  3. kailexness says:

    Beautifully written :-)

  4. Your words are perfect and the photos are great :)

  5. Deer Baby says:

    Beautiful words. And pictures. You’re both lucky.

  6. This. Yes, I feel this.

    Beautiful.

  7. sister3 says:

    ok, well done, now I want another baby
    All that because of you picture and your text
    pffff

  8. Mirka Moore says:

    A very lovely poem and nice pictures to go with it ;)

  9. Hi,
    Sian – MummyTips / CyberMummy Here…… I’ve just posted with the info you need in order to get your pic printed for the real life CyberMummy Gallery exhibition courtesy of Photobox.
    http://www.mummy-tips.com/2010/06/cybermummy-gallery-get-your-pics-in.html
    Do add htp://www.Mummy-tips to your blogroll if you like what you read…

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