So the pre ‘last-dump-of-snow-which-surprises-everyone-in-April-every-year’ Spring has sprung here in Bavaria; The weekend topped 18 degrees, the snowdrops and crocuses are out … and, ahem, Twitter is full of the springclean hashtag. Don’t get me wrong, I love, love Twitter and the bloggers and tweeters I have met over the past two years have kept me going and given me motivation in many, many different ways, but this week I was overwhelmed – in that *stands in the middle of the room with shoulders hunched up to the ears and a bubble rising from top of head containing “What? … how … ?? when … ?? … b-b-b-bu … ?!!” thing going on.
Saturday morning, (yesterday) … the house is silent – Little One’s away with his Dad and ear-achy Surrogate#1 has been returned to her mother and a hot-water bottle. I’m standing at the kitchen door with a cup of coffee, idly watching my son kicking a ball around the back field with his Papa and feeling really rough. Months of him coughing in my face have finally caught up and I have a throat full of razor blades. I look around in disgust at the state of my place, still not sorted after a week of chasing deadlines and think of all the other things stacking up on my to-do list. After a generally horrible month so far, I feel frustrated, fed-up and totally lacking in motivation for anything.
Backing up to wander into the bathroom, the sun moves around slightly, catching the window. I draw breath at how beautiful the day actually is and I dump my cup with alarming force …
That’s all it took. The window was ridiculously grimy and my reaction to it had been the same as it had been every day for about the last 6 months – annoyance pure, but despite considering for a millisecond all the other things I had to do, this time I headed for the cupboard with a resolve I hadn’t felt for ages.
A couple of hours later, I had cleaned all the windows in the flat and, although the rest of the place still looked like a bomb-site, I, myself, felt like a million dollars.
It was like a revelation … suddenly seeing sun streaming through gleaming glass in every room was like I had scrubbed at something in my head and found gold – the listless, lonely, black feeling of despondency that had grounded me for the last few days was on its way out and I felt a new fire in my belly – the go-go which was telling me to shake myself up again and get stuff done.
Army-Major style, I then restricted myself to one room and one activity at a time for the rest of the day and cleared more washing, clutter, toys and general “stuff” than I had cleared in weeks.
For an innate multi-tasker and, despite years as an industry project manager, I’m still a rubbish Hausfrau and am actually generally useless at ‘finishing’ anything! so for me, although the flat is still far from being how I want it, yesterday was a real achievement. I’m guessing I’m not actually alone in these traits, so this is a call to anyone who bounces enthusiastically into Spring to be met with the brick wall of a springclean hashtag and finds themselves pinned against it, at a loss as to where to start …. my tip, as a working mum who is rather hugely lacking in self-organisational skills:
Start with the windows! :-)